Charming Sweetheart Blog

Recreational time at the coast, 34 degrees, a slight breeze is tickling our noses.
Simply lying by the waterside, relaxing, reading, dreaming.
A wonderful time really!

“Hey, the sun umbrella is not really sturdy?”
“It will hold, darling. And it doesn´t go any deeper into the sand.”

“Great, and if it does tip over, it will fall right onto me!”
“It won´t tip over. And you can also lay down on the other side.”

“But then I´ll be in the shade!”
“No, I mean here to the right…”

“But then I´m so far away from you! No!”
“And what do you want me to do now??”

“You have to hold the umbrella.”
“Honey! I can´t hold on to the umbrella the entire time!”

“But if it might tip over anytime I can´t sleep!”
“It won´t tip over! Before that happens, you´ll be blown away.”

“Do you want me to be blown away??”
“No, honey. Of course I don´t.”

“Don´t you want to be at the beach with me?”
“But…”

“…Because I gained so much weight??”
“You didn´t gain weight, you´re thin and very tan.”

“I´m not tan, look here!”
“Honey, a fried chicken would already have trouble having your colour!”

“That´s not true! Do you still love me?”
“Yes, honey. I love you.”

“Then give me a kiss!”
“Yes, honey.”

[I stand up, go around the umbrella to my beloved and want to give her a kiss because I love her so, and she is so heart-melting...]

“Oh man! You put so much sand on my towel with your feet!”
“Honey, I just wanted to kiss you…”

“Now everything is all full of sand, and me too, and now I have to go back into the water!”
“I´m sorry, but I mean, we´re at the beach, and…”

“And I also have to turn off my mobile again!”
“Your mobile??”

“I always turn off my mobile when I go into the water.”
“Ok… But what do you need a mobile here for anyway??”

“Well, if I need to call for help.”
“Call for help??”

“If the umbrella tips over and injures me, for example.”
“Oh, but wouldn´t it be easier just to ask me??”

“You??”
“Yes, me, and anyway, the umbrella does not tip over!”

“But you won´t help me then!”
“EXCUSE ME??”

“I have to go into the water because of you now! I´m going now.”
“Wait, I´ll go with you.”

[We go to the water and stand in it with our feet....]

“But don´t make me wet! I may go into shock then!”
“I´m not doing anything!”

“But you´re looking at me like that again.”
“ME?? I´m just standing here!”

“You wanted to make me wet!”

[My sweetheart quickly bends over and thrusts a huge fountain of cold water onto me, I almost have a heart attack...]

“Haha! Now you´re wet!”
“Thank you, sweetheart, very refreshing… I thought you just said…”

“Oh come on, don´t be a baby, lets go swimming.”

[We go swimming and stand up on a small sandbank...]

“Now it is rather cold, with this wind…”
“Honey, it´s over 30 degrees, you can´t be cold now!”

“Yes, I can, look here, I have goose bumps.”
“Okay, well, then… we better swim back, ok?”

“But don´t push me underwater!”
“Honey, I never did, I didn´t want to…”

“Then I´ll get water in my nose and my hair will get wet!”
“I won´t push you underwater, don´t worry…”

“You have to be nice to me!”
“I´m really being nice to you, honey. Like always.”

“I bet the umbrella was blown away in the meantime.”
“Honey, you´re making me crazy with that silly umbrella!”

“But I can´t see it anymore, look!”
“But we´re a lot farther to the right, there, next to the landing stage!”

“Oh. Good, that I wasn´t lying there.”
“BUT NOTHING HAPPENED!”

“I´m cold. And I have to shake out my towel. And you didn´t give me a kiss either!”

Women…

My girlfriend and I love musicals.
Sometimes we go to see one, and because we find it to be relatively expensive, we always try to get the best seats.
Five minutes left… Let´s go!

“These seats in the forth row are good, aren´t they?”
“Yes, honey, we got great seats here.”

“Funny, the theatre is half empty. But the show is good, isn´t it?”
“The problem is surely not the show. Look there, there are also free seats there in front.”

“There in the first row?”
“Almost right in the middle. So we go and sit there now, ok?”

“We should go and sit on those seats?? But they´re not ours!”
“And??” Obviously there is nobody sitting there yet.”

“But we only have tickets for row four?”
“Sure, but…”

“But surely that is not allowed!”
“Yes, but who cares?? Come on, let´s go sit in the first row.”

“I like it here.”
“Okay, so then let´s stay here!”

[2 minutes later...]

“Why is that stupid cow sitting down right in front of me now!?”
“Ah…”

“I can´t see anything now!”
“We could move to the first row, there you wouldn´t have anybody in front of you?”

“But she could go and sit there, as there are still seats free there!”

Women…

In October, my sweetheart and I have a two-week holiday.
Of course, now the question is, where do we go;
a proper destination must be found…
But I´m sure: the internet will help us!

“Can´t we look online to see what there is?”
“Of course, sweetheart! Just a minute… there! Where do you want to go?

“Let me see!”
“Here: Formentera, Santorini, Malta…”

“No.”
“Or: Teneriffa, Madeira, La Gomera…”

“No.”
“Hm, how about Crete to visit the Greek?”

“No.”
“Don´t tell me you want to go to Mallorca??”

“No.”
“Ok. And where do you want to go now?”

“Somewhere where it´s warm.”
“What? All of this is eliminated because it is not warm enough there??”

“I am not going to go on vacation and be cold there!”
“So you think you would be cold on Santorini??”

“In that column there it says that it´s only 26 degrees there.”
“Do you mean you are only looking at the temperatures?”

“Of course! I want to go somewhere where it´s nice and warm.”
“But you don´t know that beforehand?”

“Well, if it says something there, it will be for a reason.”
“But honey… ok. Would Singapore be warm enough?”

“Is Singapore on the list?”
“No. But it is surely not cold there.”

“Is Singapore expensive?”
“More expensive than Crete for sure… but it is warm, very warm…”

“Is that where the Tsunami was?”
“I think so…”

“Is there nothing warm on the Canary islands?”
“Well…but nothing over 26 degrees. But it is very beautiful there…”

“We must be able to find someplace where it is nice and warm!”
“And how am I supposed to do that?? You don´t like the list!”

“Then look for a different list, there must be one that fits!”

Women…